It’s amazing to look back at what these past three years have been like in comparison to the rest of my life. Was I even really living then? Sure I had my wonderful moments, but I honestly believe that everything came together for me when my husband D and I started dating. Sometimes teenage girls that I know will talk to me about my family. “Oh Abby, you guys have the perfect life. Perfect family. Perfect job… how did you know that he was the one?” Quite frankly every time this happens I wish I could bare my broken little soul and tell them all about how perfection doesn’t exist and how I wasn’t always in this happy bubble, but usually I smile and respond with, ‘when you’ll know you’ll know’. But the longer version is this:
There is no right or wrong formula for love. Sometimes you will find a couple that have known each other their entire life and were meant for one another. Then there are others that randomly meet in the oddest of situations and believe that they were meant to find one another. D and I are in no ones book the perfect couple. We are actually very far from being perfect. When we began our “love story” we had already been in each others lives for a while. Same high school. Same year. Never bothered to know the other one existed. We were at the same place so many times… but back then I was dating someone else and so was he. Never bothered to acknowledge each other. Fast forward lots of years and we were once again facing similar situations. We were both single after failed relationships. So this time when we came together, we noticed. We came together so easily and naturally that I was shocked and afraid. I kept thinking that it was too good to be true, and that he would be the kind of heart break I would never get over. But he eased his way into my heart and made a place for himself there… and here we are, three years later. Sometimes it feels like I have been with him my entire life because of so much that has happened during this time.
So if I were to give any kind of girl advice to those young teens it would be:
- Believe in the unexpected. It’s true what they say that when you least expect it you can meet someone that will change your life. Or maybe someone you already know and had no plans of falling for, he will be the one.
- Be with someone that drives you crazy. Too often there are relationships with dull feelings. People that are just meh about each other. I do completely understand that at some point in time during the relationship you may feel that way, but it shouldn’t be that way initially. Those first months of being in love are so great… they are in fact the best. Feel the butterflies, the fireworks and every bit of excitement that keeps you from sleeping every night.
- Love openly, deeply and freely. Don’t be afraid to get your heart broken. Which means you just fall and fall hard. Despite of what may be the outcome. It’s not easy at first because getting hurt sucks, trust me I have been there too. But when you happen to fall in love with the right person, nothing beats that feeling of having them love you for who you are, every single bit of you.
I remember that those first couple of dates with him I would come home with a horrible stomach ache. I mean.. I was running to the bathroom. Sometimes it would happen right before I would see him too. That’s how I knew. He shook every piece of me. And still today, even if we have a huge fight over the most insignificant thing, like the redesign of our house; where something goes or whether or not we will share an office, closet, bathroom – the kind of thing that only married people seem to do – the moment we are over it (and I have convinced him. 🙂 I joke, or I have totally given in because its not worth loosing sleep or missing our episode of Grey’s Anatomy) I always wonder why it is we ever fight in the first place. We fall together back into being each other’s home.
This past weekend we celebrated our third year anniversary and that’s why there has been so much talk about love and what not on here. Tomorrow for #twintuesday I will post pictures from our weekend and tell you all about how my original plans went completely out the door and what we ended up doing instead.